Do they have fireman in Canada?

After today I would have to answer a resounding YES!!!

So a few days before Christmas my dad turned on the wrong burner and burnt a decorative stovetop covering. Oops. He quickly went to the store, bought a new set, wrapped them and put them under the tree for my mom. All was well in Canada.

This morning Cster decided to use the stove. Turned it on and left while the kettle boiled. (A watched pot doesn't boil you know) My mom walked in a few minutes later and started yelling. Oops. Smoke billowed everywhere and this time we got flames. Real flames. My parents have an alarm system that calls you if an alarm goes off. They called and my mom said "we put it out, no problem". Not 5 minutes later a firetruck pulled up and two firemen jumped off the truck in full gear. "Nothing to see here folks". He did his investigation and didn't even roll his eyes once or make fun of us. While the firemen were coming in my uncle pulls up too. Apparently when they couldn't get a hold of us the alarm company called every emergency contact on my parents list. My aunt, my uncle, my dad at work. Oh the drama.

Alas we are fine. A little cold from having to air out the house all morning but fine.

And no more decorative stove top covers again. Ever.

Confessions...

I once shared an entire box of turtles with a friend. Mmmm...I love turtles.

Tis the Season...

I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!

I'm one of those crazy people that think we need more Christmas in our lives. We should do as much as possible. I LOVE IT ALL!!!! (That being said I am posting instead of wrapping Christmas presents...oops)

Our Christmas season has been so great so far. We took the much dreaded 12 hour drive to the In-Laws and Mster was fabulous. She got 5 stars. I sat in the back with her for the whole trip which helped dramatically. Much singing. Much reading. Much tickling. Much of everything and then repeat but we arrived and all was well. Well, all was well except our stupid cold and Msters crazy sleep patterns but no need to get into that. The in-laws are great. We are saddened to not partake of their traditions this year. No pots and pots of clam chowder followed by cranberry blows on Christmas Eve. No opening presents in our pajamas.

We arrived at my parents yesterday and the trip was AWESOME!!! My mother got us business class seats (yeah points) and I don't think I can ever go back to coach. The airport was a ZOO and yet we just walked up to the ticket counter and got our boarding pass. The security was a mile long and we just walked up to our "special" security area and boom we were ready to head to our gate. We boarded and realized that 2 business class seats are equal to 10 regular seats. Aaah!!! It was great. Much beverages were consumed along with warm nuts in a bowl, an edible meal (including a warm chocolate chip cookie). Heaven!! The flight attendant even came over while we were changing Mster to take away her diaper. (Now hopefully all of you know me well enough to know that I am not a snob nor do I expect those in the service industry to do demeaning stuff such as take away a nasty poopy diaper but I have to admit it was nice not to have to figure out what to do with it afterwards. And for those that are currently disgusted that I would even think to change Mster in business class and not in the bathroom I would encourage you to take another look at the size of the bathroom next time you fly.)

We arrived save and sound. Canada is great, albeit lacking in snow. Cster has yet to wear a jacket. Crazy Cster. In fact, Cster has yet to wear a shirt with long sleeves on it (and we've been outside on numerous occasions). Mster loves the lights and loves blow up outdoor Christmas decorations. Today has been a day full of "NO" (snow) and "NOMA" (snoman) and "pdee" (pretty, as in pretty tree, or pretty lights) and "more" (as in more slides, more blow up snowman, more running, more tickling)

Happy holidays to all!

AaaChoo!!

mmmm....Nyquil.

A rose by any other name...

This past week Mster has decided its time to start calling me Mama. Its awesome. Now its not used all the time but its used. At first we had a little confusion and Cdawg was also Mama but I think she's got us differentiated now. Yeah Mster!!!

It was very sweet today to pick her up from a friends house. The door opened and the look on Msters face when she saw it was me was so precious. Then the little Mamas that came from her mouth could have melted my heart.

Can anyone translate this?

Wada...wada...waga...walalalala repeated over and over again on the way to pick up Cster from school.

Has it really been 4 days?

It was brought to my attention that I haven't posted in awhile. So here goes:

1. I wasn't going to post anything about this for fear that the perpetrator would one day read my blog and I would feel bad but the story needs to be said. A little over a week ago I babysat for a sick baby. (not the 4 year old) His mama was desperate and had to go to work so I reluctantly said yes. She swore that her kid wasn't sick. It was obvious only 5 minutes after she left that yes, her kid was sick and I spend the next 4 hours wiping his snot ridden face. I felt for the little guy. I wouldn't want to just sit there and have to wait for somebody to wipe the snot dripping from my nose. A few days later Mster started showing signs of sickness and it was also soon apparent that she was ill also. Then friday I woke up and realized that I had contracted the dang thing too. Erg!!! I hate being sick and I was just sick. Why are the sick people out to get me?

2. In my sick induced daze that was yesterday I received a lovely package in the mail from Immigration. It seems that it is time for another interview. This time I get to go to Montreal. My brain could not handle this yesterday. I was flipping out. Somehow I was responsible for getting myself to Montreal on Jan. 25 at 9:30 AM. Erg!! Yeah for my mama who is going to rearrange her schedule and meet me there to help with Mster. Yeah for mini-vacations.

3. I didn't realize it was possible but the Cster broke his toothbrush approximately 30 minutes after I came home from the store on friday. The head broke off. Stop brushing so vigourously Cster.

4. I've gotten lots of questions regarding this cold. Seems people are a little interested in its possibilities. Here are some comments/questions I've heard today:

a) So you have a cold?
yes
Is it just a cold?
yes
Is it just a cold that you have?
yes
b) After announcing that I wanted to throw up.
Oh?!?!?
c) Is it the same thing Mster has/had?
yes

So for all you nosy people out there (and I say that with the utmost regards :) ) I have a cold, period. I may have experienced significant sickness for 9 months about 16 months ago but this is a cold. Period.

5. In my drug induced state on friday night while lying in bed I talked myself into thinking that the duet betwee Ernie and Peabo Bryson on Sesame Street that morning was one of the best songs I'd ever heard. I still kind of believe myself. I'm still sort of drugged up.

And now I bid you adieu to escape to my bed o'blankets and pillows. Aaah.....

Show Me the Poo!

Today I babysat a 4 year old girl, I'll call her G--. Mster needed a diaper change and so I started to tell Mster that we needed to go to her room. Here is the conversation that ensued.

G--: does she have a stinky diaper?

Burrito: Yes, she does.

G--: What's it full of?

Burrito: What?

G--: What's it full of?

Burrito: Poo.

G--: No, its Poop.

Burrito: Okay, poop.

G--: SHOW ME THE POOP!!!!

Burrito: Huh?!?

G--: SHOW ME THE POOP!!!

Burrito: If you really want to see we're going to her room to change the diaper now.

Exodus to the bedroom. Mster is on the change table and I'm in the midst of changing her.

G--: (climbed on the first shelf of the change table) SHOW ME THE POOP!! SHOW ME THE POOP!! SHOW ME THE POOP!!

Burrito: Here it is.

And that's the end of that story. I was so disappointed in its anti-climatical ending. She got down off the change table and went back to playing with toys. But when she was talking earlier it had the exuberance of Cuba Gooding Jr. in Jerry McGuire.

SHOW ME THE MONEY!!

Stuck...Stuck...Stuck!

Mster's big thing to say right now is "stuck". She gets herself into situations where she can't move and then looks at me and says "stuck". I always answer "are you stuck?" To which she answers, "uh, duh, mom, that's why I just said stuck". Well that's what I envision her saying but really she just repeats stuck. I mean lets be honest she can't even say mommy yet.

So right now I'm stuck. I have given all of my gift ideas for Cster away. And now I'm stuck for an idea for him. I finally got a great idea from my neighbour and I went out the next day to purchase it only to have Mster dig it out for all to see. So, now I'm back to square one. Help!!! oh and he reads this so anything you say will have to be in code. I guess a better idea would be to just have the Cster not read the comments.

CSTER YOU CAN NOT READ THE COMMENTS!!!!!

Now many of you will say, "silly burrito, of course he will read the comments and you will remain at square one forever". But you would be wrong. I have faith in the Cster. I know he loves surprizes and he will not read them.

Stuck...

Holiday Eating Tips

I got this in the mail today and realized that maybe we do need a few tips for mass Christmas food consumption

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

I always eat the carrot sticks. In fact, once at Denny's when I was a wee lass I asked for a side of carrots instead of fries. Bring on the carrots.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

The idea of drinking anything with egg in it sounds repulsing. I hate eggnog purely for the fact that it does have egg in the name. Well, I think I have drank it once (maybe twice) and I'm sure I didn't like it. Maybe it has something to do with my white dairy issue*.

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

I do like gravy. mmm...

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

I do like mashed potatoes too. mmm...I would prefer not to know either way if there was whole milk or skim. (Back to the white dairy issue) because I would rather eat my potatoes in ignorant bliss.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your neating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

I think that you shouldn't stop yourself from eating at all during the holidays. If your hungry before you go to the party, eat. If not, don't. If you're eating so you don't eat as much at the party lets get real, you will still eat lots. mmm...carrot sticks.

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll nee after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

Whatever, carrying around a 10-pound plate of food is exercise.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

Agreed

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

Well, I can think of lots of time I get good desert and can't think of lots of time when I get turkey and mashed potatoes and yummy gravy and stuffing. You can have my dessert, just leave the plate o'turkey in front of me.

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it\'s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

Agreed.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

Amen.

* Since I can remember I can not eat white dairy in any sort of creamy or solid form. Its disgusting. This includes but is not limited to: plain yogurt, cottage cheese, sour cream, anything but skim milk, cream cheese. Now as soon as these items are mixed with other food I'm okay. So strawberry yogurt, (cottage cheese is just out), onion dip, etc. I'm fine with. I think it all stems from my idea as a youngin that white dairy reminded me of fat. I thought it was like eating fat directly. Now I just can't eat it and I know that there's no fat in it. (ie fat free plain yogur, sour cream)

Brr...Why is it so Cold?

Dear Maintenance Workers,

Its nice that you come to my house and fix broken things. I do appreciate it. I'm not sure what exactly you are doing with the backyard but you came on friday (after a weeks absence) and dug more of the sidewalk up. Perhaps you noticed while working that it was chilly. I think you did because when I went to take out the garbage in my sandals and no coat you were bundled up really well. This is why I was shocked this morning when I went to take the garbage out again to notice that you left the back door open and the lights on in the basement. Now I have to admit I thought our back door was a bit chillier than I remembered it getting last year but I just chalked it up to a bad memory and put a pillow to block the cold air. i can understand forgetting to turn off a light, who hasn't? But, why wouldn't you close the back door? I don't even know when you are coming to be able to keep a watch out for when you may or may not close it in the future.

So please, its all I ask you, SHUT THE DARN DOOR when you are done!!!

Squishy

I love the Botanical Gardens!

I do not love the crazy fish that are at the Botanical Gardens. I call them mutant fish. People can feed them from a 25cent vending machine and everybody says "well, its only 25cents and I got in for free so why not?" and so these fish live to be fed. They are MONGO HUGE and there are tons of them. There are also ducks that eat right out of the fishes mouth. CRAZY!!!

photo curtesy of valentine.toddatgmail.com

Its time to elect a new Prime Minister

Canadians are going to the voting booths sometime in January (I can't remember the exact date and I'm too lazy to go back and find out). So here is a great opportunity to learn a little bit about government in Canada.

Federal electorates are called ridings. In the riding where you reside you are responsible for voting for which candidate you want to represent you in parliament. They are called members of parliament (mps) and are usually affiliated with a party. At the end of voting day they count up all the ballots and determine who will lead each riding. The leader of the party with the most ridings becomes the Prime Minister.

Elections occur whenever the current Prime Minister decides they are going to happen but they have to occur at least every 5 years. The last election occurred sometime between August 2004 and June 2005 (again I remember voting but I'm too lazy to go back and check exact dates). In that election the winning party (the Liberals) gained the most ridings but still had a minority in the government making any sort of effectiveness impossible. Amidst scandal and a growing lack of confidence the other parties bullied the Liberals into calling a new election.

There are 4 major parties right now in Canada. The Liberals, the Conservatives, the NDP (National Democratic Party) and the Bloc Quebecois (free Quebec). I find it fascinating that a party whose main goal is to have Quebec separate is a major part of parliament. We have the pothead party and other side ones too and independents but they rarely get in.

So there you go. Elections are a coming. I can't wait to get up to Canada this Christmas and hear all the campaigning while chestnuts roast on our fire (note sarcasm).

Cster found a blog that seems to be giving a running commentary on the Campaigns. Check it out here.

A side note on our elections:
Last election I was registered to vote in my parents riding. I did not want to drive all the way down there so I went to my local riding voting place showed them my drivers license and they registered me right there to vote (with no computers, just a little white haired woman with a ruler, a pen and a highlighter and a big wad of paper with everybodies name on it.) They hadn't me my card and I went and voted. After the process I realized that Cster while not Canadian had a valid drivers license and if we weren't such good law abiding folk he probably could have gotten a voter card too. And if I so desired I probably could have gone to my parents riding and voted there too. Hmmm...

I want a Hippoptamus for Christmas

I just sent out our family Christmas list to the family and plan on writing my dream list on the blog shortly but I thought while you wait you might enjoy this.

And then there were 4...NO!!!!!!!!

So I'm pretty sure I found another tooth today. Holy teethcutting Mster. Where are you finding the time to do everything else you do in a day.

Conversation with Mster yesterday:

Me: Can you get your hat?

Mster: No

Me: Do you want your ball?

Mster: No

Me: Do you want some water?

Mster: No

Me: Let's read a good book.

Mster: No

Me: Its time to change your diaper.

Mster: No

And then the ultimate test to see if I could get her to say it one more time...

Me: Mster, do you want chocolate cake?

Mster: No


She does impress the Cster and I with her amazing going to bed abilities. As soon as I say the magical words "Mster its time for bed/nap." she jumps up from whatever she's doing (sometimes gives a little cheer), runs to Cster and gives him a kiss than proceeds to her bedroom where she reminds of all the things I may forget that are involved in bedtime. ie: blanket, soother (binky), heater, etc.

She also cracked me up yesterday when she picked up some old food on the floor. I said "Mster that's garbage give it to me" and she said "No" walked to the garbage can in the kitchen, took the lid off, put the garbage in, put the lid back on and then proceeded to try and lift the garbage can to the deep freezer. (I often do this after I put garbage in the bin from Mster since she likes to play with it).

Its very interesting to see the little neurons working away and remembering our repetitive patterns.