5 dollars

Mster offered me 5 dollars the other day to have another baby.

Hello Bandwagon. May I Jump On?

I think at least 80% of the women I know are reading, or have read, the Twilight series by Stephanie Meyer. Even though I have 4 great books (so I'm told) sitting on my nightstand I can not muster the enthusiasm to open them up and actually start reading. Yet, I have the urge to read.

And so I decided to try out Ms Meyer's work. I had been warned of its addicting tendencies and worried myself slightly over its sucking powers (no pun intended) but, I was drawn to a book that so many people couldn't put down.

Today I got my first book (borrowed from a friend because I am 168th on the library list for the copy) and I just so happened to get the worst headache of the year. After 2 aspirins with codeines and 2 exedrin migraines and a frantic call to Cster to get home ASAP before our children die from abandonment I was in no position to introduce myself to Bella and Edward. But once the children were asleep and the headache dulled I opened it up and I have to say I'm intrigued. Sadly its midnight and I'm now in my medicated state where I can't think straight, I'm wide awake and I'm dreading my day tomorrow and contemplating whether I should just go get the book and keep reading (which is what I really want to do) worried that it will keep me up later than the drugs.

So instead I decide to stay up late and blog about the addicting power of the book that will keep me up all night instead of actually reading the book all night. Productive.

But tomorrow has to be better. There are children who need feeding, bathing, teaching, nurturing, you know all that mothering stuff.

Ding Dong the Mouse is Dead

I AM SO EXCITED!!!! I can't stop changing the words to songs I know to incorporate dead mice.

I pulled out everything in the kitchen on Saturday and cleaned way too much mouse turd for my liking. Then after I pulled everything out with Cster's brother (Cster was playing mud football in the rain) my in-laws came over to check out the chaos (actually to pick up the brother) and I was embarrassed but I didn't care. And then I took a 4 hour break to visit a friend at the hospital (nickels can get lodged in 4 year olds throats and require surgery). And then I finished the kitchen and moved onto the laundry room to try and fix my dryer and make way for the new washing machine that was scheduled to arrive between 5:30-7:30pm on a Saturday. So my laundry room got scrubbed. The dryer didn't get fixed and I decidedt o leave with the kids at 6pm to keep them away from delivery men carrying major appliances. When we got back I had a new washing machine that was cleaning clothes at that moment. Cster had set up the hotel mouse trap and life was looking good.

And then I woke up this morning and IT WAS DEAD!!! I can't believe it. We've had mouse traps up for 2 months with no mouse. I bought the hotel traps over a week ago but we never set them up. ONE NIGHT of 1 hotel trap and its dead.

Life is good.

(any body want crappy mouse traps that don't work).

Nothing

Mster: Is Tutu my Grandma?
Me: Yes.
Mster: Okay, then I will swim with Tutu, Grandma, and Uncle D but not with you because you are nothing to me.

The Smartest Mouse EVER!!!

We are living with the smartest mouse EVER!!!!

It all started MONTHS ago. Cster heard a mouse under our couch. We bought old school traps and filled them with peanut butter. Inevitably everytime we checked the traps they were empty (of both peanut butter and mice). And yet with the tiny touch of the trigger they would go off. He/she ate everything off of every single trap and somehow magically escaped.

So we decided to buy different traps. Still no luck. We actually figured he had left us since we hadn't heard from him in awhile and found an open door to go live happily with his family 3 houses down. Sadly he/she must have realized that his family is now gone (that house has killed 15 mice with their traps) and has returned to live with us.

And really why wouldn't he/she. No matter how hard I try he has an endless supply of cereal and crackers from my children who feel the need to spread their snack love moments after I vacuum EVERY SINGLE TIME. Clearly he/she's brilliant because on top of all the cheerios and goldfish he/she could imagine he's getting some free peanut butter protein.

This is a smart mouse. I couldn't find the poop forever but now I'm finding it in all sorts of different places. But not a lot in those places. He's a mover. I always clean it out right away and put a trap there and off he goes to his new locale to poop there.

I just heard him while typing in the dark in the kitchen behind my fridge* and low and behold I found more mouse turd. I've decided to trick the little rodent. I left everything as much the way as I could (including the turd) and put a trap there. A sticky trap that apperently once he steps on it will force him to stay there until Cster takes him out (because if anybody thinks I will do it they are sorely mistaken). I'm wondering what will happen if he ever does walk in on one of these sticky ones. I'm sure he won't go out without a battle. Will he squeal and yell that he's stuck in the hopes that one of his family was really on vacation and not lying dead in a heap of trash in the bin and will be able to come pull him off. I'm feeling this might get ugly. It better not happen when Cster isn't here. I can honestly say I would call him at work and tell him to come home.

And so I've written more about this stupid (but really really smart) mouse than I have about my kids. Stupid mouse.


*the mouse was behind the fridge, not me typing on my computer (in case you were confused)

Heat Transference

Cster taught Mster about heat transference a few weeks ago. Yesterday we had 2 girls over to play with Mster. They were sitting around the little table when Mster breaks out in a physics lecture.

Mster: Do you girls know about heat transference?
S: (oblivious to anything but her bowl of mac n cheese)
E: No?
Mster: Well, its like this. You take a drink of milk and you eat hot mac n cheese and the milk makes the mac n cheese not so hot. that's heat transference.
E: Yeah.